730 Dilemma

What is running on my mind?

Its just like a crossed railroad....

Sometime we crossed over to met each other

when after a short time,we are force to separate to move on to the other path.

Life never goes so smoothly like what we want,it won't go the way as we wish.

Life was like something unpredictable,you'll never know what's next.

Sometime we put in hope but end up with disappointment.

Sometime we felt hopeless but God still putting chances and brighten up our days with new hopes.

But......

What will you decided when comes to the junction ??

Left with what you have now then move forward to other journey ??

Or......

Staying with what you have now then give up what's in front of the other end??

I know what is the best for you...

I shouldn't stop you from your success...

I should be happy that you have your planning for the future...

I shouldn't be so selfish want you to stay with me...

and I should be happy that you are mature in handling what you're facing..

But....

Little bit of upset...

why??

Am I afraid of being alone??

Or....??

Am I afraid of something repeated just like the past??

What if one day you left me?

I.....dun know...

Even if I trust you....but I'm not trusting myself...

I do scare that ...the more I cares,the more I hurts..

From the passes experience...

who knows what's gonna happen next??

But still....

I'm telling myself to be a big girl now...

to handling things with a mature minded...

if someone decided to leave,no one stop....

so I choose to believe to covered all the emotional which is not true...

Once again I'm in dilemma...

But....this time I have you....

I'm sure that you'll protect me and love me even if we keep some distance...

and I'm sure!!!!you will marry me one day...

we should fight for our future...

my faith will prove that you are the right one I'm waiting for and looking for...

and...

the only one that I wanna stay forever with...